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Thursday, July 18, 2013

Giving Up

Throughout my entire pregnancy I have been saying I would work until baby shows up, even if I was overdue. People would roll their eyes when I told them this and I would tell them it would give me more time with my baby at home so it would be worth it. Now, I can truly say I underestimated the power these last couple weeks can have over a lady and her sanity. After nearly breaking down crying several times and almost biting a couple heads off, I decided it would be best for everyone (baby, coworkers, and myself) if tomorrow - my due date - was my last work day. I need a clean break. I don't think I could mentally enter next week at a comfortable or peaceful place.

Part of me feels like I gave up. I didn't reach my goal. I'm a quitter. But then I remind myself that making it to 40 weeks and working until my due date is reaching a goal. This little girl just has slightly different plans than I do. That doesn't mean I failed. From what I've heard, motherhood ain't easy. And it's all about giving yourself grace. And having patience. To say I just received a crash course in these lessons this last week would be an understatement. And I know once this little one decides to show, I will learn exponentially more than I could ever have thought.

Baby B, we can't wait to meet you. We can't wait to see your face and give you a name. Please don't make us wait too much longer!

1 comment:

amanda said...

Saw (via Katie) that you'd had your sweet little girl. Congratulations! And you definitely didn't give up, you did what was best for you and the baby. That's one of the hardest lessons of motherhood-stepping aside from what you plan or expect and stepping into what is best for your family. Good job, mama!