For the past 8 weeks I have been going to see a counselor.
Shock. Gasp. Ohmygosh. Are you judging me? Are you over it? Okay, good. Let's move on.
Now that we've cleared the air, I want to talk about one of my sessions. It involved a conversation about the word should.
"I should go to the gym."
"I should eat a salad for dinner instead of a big greasy cheeseburger."
"I should go back to school to get my Master's degree."
Do any of these sound familiar? I can't be the only one plaguing my life with should's.
Now let's examine how much of a negative connotation this word holds. By labeling things we should or should not do, we are basically setting ourselves up for failure. We're making whatever that thing we should(n't) be doing so!negative! and we are completely criticizing ourselves in the process. Why would we do that to ourselves?
I say we stop making excuses. If you don't want to go to the gym or eat a salad for dinner, own it. If a healthy lifestyle is one you're after, great. One off day now and again isn't going to throw your plan completely off if you've truly committed yourself to a goal. I actually believe if you deprive yourself of things you want to eat but "shouldn't" then you're more likely to derail your overall plan than if you give in one time. (Disclaimer: I'm fully aware everyone is different. I'm only speaking for myself here.)
Anyway. I'm on a mission to rid myself of the should's in my life. Here is my new goal: either do it, or don't do it. It's a waste of time and breath exclaiming what I should be doing. No more excuses. I'm going to stop setting myself up for failure and I'm going to start owning my decisions. This is an important step I'm taking on my quest for gratitude and latitude. I'm going to accept my flaws and be grateful for the choices I'm allowed to make.
Is anyone with me? Ready. Go.
3 comments:
What the heck's wrong with a counselor? I love that. Good for you for taking things into your own hands and not sitting back and doing nothing. Kudos, truly.
first off, i'm so excited that you're writing and your hubby was right- you are an excellent writer! and the counselor thing? so not something i would judge you on. it's so good to have a place where you can process stuff!
i'm also a chronic "should" person... thanks for the challenge to do or not do and be free in whatever i choose. :)
Speaking of letting go of the "should", here is a cool site with some other things to let go of that's along the same lines as what you're talking about: http://goodlifezen.com/2010/07/26/letting-go-is-not-the-same-as-giving-up/
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